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Love Bites – Silly Ways Your Dog Can Accidentally Hurt You

Love bites, love bleeds. 😛 Apart from the not so funny ways you can get hurt by your dog (bites etc ), there are always the funny, silly ways. After the first shock, the pain and the anger, you probably laugh (or at least you should – it is very unfair to punish a dog for hurting you accidentally) and let your friends make fun of you.



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Pulling game

1 While playing “pulling“, the dog, trying to grab the puller toy you are holding, accidentally grabs some of your fingers too
Result: From nothing much to a few fingers less for you


2 Your dogs are running loose in the park, chasing one another. While one of them passes by you, the second one chasing him misses a few inches and accidentally collides with your knee.
Result: From a minor bruise to a leg fracture (depending on the dog’s weight)

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Step aside or be ran over

3 While calmly walking you dog, he spots a running cat before you do, and chases it while pulling you along with him toward an unknown direction.
Result: Shock, dislocated arm, death


4 You are in bed or on the couch. Your dog and you feel a sudden simultaneous affection for one another. The dog happily jumps to you for kisses while at the same time you lean down for kisses too. You chin collides with the top of his head.
Result: Concussion, split tongue, shock.

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Seconds to collision: 3-2-1

5 You are in the middle of a rough play session with your dog, you miss your step, fall head first and land on his open mouth.
Result: Facial bite marks difficult to justify to non-dog owners, embarrassment.


6 Your dog is sound asleep and looks so cute. You can’t resist the temptation and lean over him for a hug. He wakes up startled and his head (or teeth) collide with your head.
Result: Facial bite marks difficult to justify to non-dog owners, embarrassment.

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Wolf in sheep’s skin: a sleeping dog

7 Your dog meets a friend dog on the street and they play on leash. In one on his happy, jumpy moves, he collides with your knee.
Result: From a minor bruise to a leg fracture (depending on the dog’s weight), embarrassment


8 You are at the vet. While he examines- stitches-vaccinates him, you hold his head and kiss him gently. He is in pain and suddenly lifts his head, which collides with your chin.
Result: Concussion, split tongue, shock.


9 You are in affection mode with your dog. You are face to face, talking to him and smiling, while he affectionately lifts his paw and lands in on your open mouth or eye.
Result: gum wounds, difficulty to pronounce “p” for a few hours, blindness

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Almost a number 10

10 You walk two (or more) dogs. Both smell something a few meters back and both do u-turns turning towards opposite directions. They pull you backwards, but you can’t walk because the leashes are wrapped around you legs. You fall.

Result: Bruises, embarrassment


Ok, well, some of the results were a bit too much. It is highly unlikely that you are blinded or killed accidentally by your dog – but some lacerations are inevitable.
If you had any silly accidents like these, please share. They make me laugh – and I need a laugh today.



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